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Fired to Freedom!

Fired to Freedom!

It was just like any other Friday, roll outta bed, throw my hair in a messy bun, put on my scrubs, grab a box of the extra cheesy goldfish and hit the road for work! I remember my drive in that day, the clouds were starting to part, the sun was peaking through, and there was a slight breeeze, one that was just enough to brush through the window while my seat warmer was on. It was my Fathers birthday. I called him to wish him Happy Birthday and my last few words were, " lets both make today the absolute best and then we can continue the night with celebrating you dad!" He was all on board. 

I walk into work and get a rush of patients right off the bat. It was no longer than an hour and my cell phone went off, it was my boss. He said "Borgen, do you have a minute to chat? head on outside away from others and lets shoot the breeze a minute." I grabbed my purse and went to my car away from everyone to talk. He said, " How's your day going so far," great morning, great day at work so far, and it's my dads birthday so him and I will both be in great spirits the whole day! He muttled a few words and I heard a deep sigh on the other end of the phone... "well, Haley, we've worked together for 9 years and I know you pretty darn good, you're built for bigger, you were built for more, I don't see this as your long term goal working here, I see you running a place, working at a non profit, being a speaker, and loving on everyone around you.. and this place is not it. He continues to speak very fast and tries to rush a 2 hour conversation all into 8 minutes. With hesitation I blurted out.. I... I... I'm confused. He said, " today's the end of the road Borgen, go inside get your belongings and spread your wings and fly. Go get that dream job I know you're capable of. The thoughts started rushing through my mind, I started to get a headache, it was as if I could feel a thousand tiny needles pricking my forehead all at once. I begged, what did I do wrong? what am I missing here? why is this happening? Than the other thoughts started to cloud my thinking, how will I pay bills? how will I buy food, how do I break this news?

And.. just like that, I was jobless. One would think I would feel hopeless as well, but to my surprise there was an over whelming peace that set in. I wasn't scared, I wasn't nervous, I wasn't sad.. infact..the rest of that day I was more content than I've ever been. Something in me knew that wasn't the place for me, it wasn't where God saw me long term, and that place was no longer my jouney. I said out loud to myself, "If God wanted me to stay, that door would have stayed open, but if God saw something more forseeable he would close the door right in front of me.

That's the tough part isn't it, when he knows the best plan yet we don't have a clue what's going on. When he closes a door and turns our world upside down in a minute's time and we are left with all unknowns and what if's. When he is whispering "trust me" and all we can think is  how, how how? It seems as if it's a blurry, windey, hopeless, draining road ahead, what am I suppose to do Lord."

And thats where Faith comes in, Faith is trusting even though we cannot see. Trusting, even when we do not know and Trusting even though we woulda never picked this plan for ourselves.

I took a few days off to enjoy, put the past in the past and started becoming hopeful for what the future held for me. That part was actually easy, thinking of what my life could look like, where I might start over, where the new road could lead. Thrilling, Hopeful, Ecstatic! 

In the blink of an eye February turned into March, March slowly dwindled into April, April cruised into May and before I knew it I applied for 78 jobs. Draining.. YES! Throughout the job searching process a close friend of mine told me the job market is pretty slow and places are taking atleast 4 weeks to get back to an applicant. Talk about the emotional rollercoaster. Hopeful to see a job thats interesting, frusterating to apply and fill out applications that ask 60 questions, to submit and have to wait "patiently" to even hear if they're interested in an interview. 

I heard 78 No's.. No, No thank you, Not interested, We've searched elsewhere...you'd be wonderful but... the list goes on! I would have way rather seen an email come back with big red letters saying DENIED, rather than explainging all the positives and then in size 8 size way at the bottom be rejected. 

Through these few months, I had the absolute best times of my life, however financially the worst time of my life. Let me explain. I got to bring my dad to a surgery and be right  by his side the following days. I got to wake up to my sister who works at home everyday, we got to each lunch together every single day. I had a phone call with a friend Chantell every single day at 12:00 sharp that daily I would look forward to. I got to swing in to my parents jobs and visit. How about bonfires night after night at a friends house, with no worry of waking up bright and early to an alarm. A routine started every Thursday night at my friend Jess' house where we'd talk and have game night. Cant beat that! and lastly and most importantly.. I had so much undivided attention with Jesus. I got to know him more and he got to know me. I had more time to pray for my friends and family and people I have yet met. I got to study the word and read my bible without rushing through the pages. It was undivided time and time I needed with him at that. 

But while I raved about the greats, we cannot forget about the hurdles. The first month was glorious, the second month I could see things were starting to get tough, and the third was downright HARD! Physically, mentally, emotionally hard. It was like climbing an obstacle course waiting to see the end, climbing, tugging, crawling, jumping to get there... yet the end was no where in sight. I absolutely was the lady to count her dimes at the gas station and hold up the line, I absolutely was the lady to call all of her bill companies and tell them "I just don't have it this month" and I absolutely was the one who had to say No to the charities that I wanted to help even friends who were struggling, and that was the toughest. I knew money didn't define me however not being able to help others.. that crushed me, in fact.. I was the one who needed all the help I could get.

I got to a place in May where I had to wipe the tears, block the fears and be vulnerable and tell people in my life I needed help financially. People helped me in the most tremendous ways I didn't know were possible. A dearest friend leaving envelopes of money for me day after day, a friend who'd call every single day to ask how the job hunt was going, a selfless friend who actually paid my way to Myrtle Beach for a bachelorette party so I could still go and celebrate and carry out some normalcy in my life and the same one to hand me her credit card and say " it's yours for the weekend." A sister would paid for my bills, food and roof over my head. A church family provide my rent for another month so I didn't have to struggle.. The list goes gratefully on! I still at night break down and cry and am reminded of those who helped me when I couldn't help my self. Those are not just actions but a character of who you are and the love you have. So Thank you again.

Alright.. the final stretch of the journey. 

The 79 applicaton, I received an email back from Regency Hospital saying they wanted to interview me for a Human Resource position. This job was one that when I applied I got giddy and antsy because I wanted it so bad. 3 interviews one with the recruiter, one with Human Resources and the last with the Regional Director. After two short weeks....... SOLD!!!!! I GOT IT! PRAISE THE LORD! But here is the best part.. God is funny.. super funny and mysterious. 

What seemed of getting a job that I wanted being in Human Resources, but what I didn't come to realize was everything God was lining up through the 4 months I was jobless and moneyless. It was everything I prayed for since I was 15 for a job. It was close to home, check! My own office, check! Could eat at my desk without getting in trouble, check! Better pay than I was making, Check! My boss was a Believer, check! She even asked in my interview how I handle stress and I said " wether this is appropariate answer or not, I open my devotional and say a prayer." She said Really? Me too!" and lastly.. one that I am in awe of, I am also in charge of outreach at the hospital." I was searching for Non Profit jobs the 4 months I was in need, and here the Lord provided the outreach Non Profit work right in the place I got hired at. Toys for Tots, Relay for Life, Coat Drives, Feed My Starving Children. He was able to find a place where I could utilize my gifts and passions all into one. I have now been at this job for about a month and I believe I am exactly where I am supposed to be. I feel so much peace, contenment, I get excited to go to work each day, I talk about what God has done for me and the road I recently traveled. I am so excited to what lies ahead there. 

You may ask.. why share such a long personal story Haley, well for a reasons.

1. The same God who provided for me, can provide for you and will provide for you. He never promised the road would be easy, be he always promised it would be worth it. There will be trouble, there will be pain and hurdles but he always has your best interst in mind. It may not come how you want it, it may not look as it seems, it may not be in the time frame that you think it should be... but when its oh so right and perfect, and he is unraveling it to you.

2. To shed some hope to you and light within you, that hard times are moments passing through. It doesn't last forever, the pain you're feeling, the unknown you're facing.. IS TEMPORARY! Don't get down, Don't get stuck in the pits, that's not where you're staying. You are a warrior, a conquerer and you will rise above.  

3. Live with your wings spread. Let go of disaterous or fearful expectations. No more sleepless nights. No more overpowering people or thoughts running through your mind dictating how your life should be. Live with your head held high, your wings spread. Soar and Fly into peace that comes with each day. Turn your mind into a peace factory, turn your emotions into a healing hospital, and make Faith your wings. You got this!

4. Next time you find yourself in a situation that's not as you would have planned, tell yourself " maybe I have to go through this cause the Best is waiting on the other side."

Until next time,

xoxo

His Prompting Protection

His Prompting Protection

Leaping outta bed,  singing out loud to "Hope in Front of Me" by Danny Gokey and twirling around my room is how last Friday morning started. I was ecstatic waking up knowing I was moments away from driving to a place where I would be starting a new job orientation.

Excited-check, Hopeful-check, Nervous for a new beginning-check, yet at the same time so grateful for the new journey ahead. 

I ate a quick breakfast and darted into my car. I quickly turned on the song "Looking Up" by safety suit as the lyrics were fitting to the daily chaos I'm living, and I hit the road!

I was driving down highway 100 heading to a city called Golden Valley. Both hands on the wheel, singing to the lyrics, swaying my head left to right, embracing what was moments away from a new beginning. Windows down and smelt like freedom, when all of a sudden an overwhelming thought came over me and not a good one. Haley, you're driving to a small, dingy warehouse in Golden Valley, to meet a man, at 8:00 in the morning..... alone. As this is a smaller company, the orientation would have consisted of me and the older gentleman between four walls. The daunting image and thought that was placed in my mind was this: As I enter the building, he asks for my cellphone to download a work app, steals my phone, locks the warehouse doors, shuts the blinds, and locks me in all weekend. No escape, and no way out. The smile on my face quickly turns upside down and into an expression of pure fear. Where did these thoughts come from? Why did this visual get placed upon me?

I quickly take my first exit and pull into a parking lot to gather my thoughts and compose myself. I started praying, "Lord, remove these thoughts from my mind, strip them out of me, Lord, fill me with your peace, your promises and protect me while I walk into this orientation, In Jesus name, Amen!

I felt peace in that moment, knowing he heard my prayer and would be right there with me. As I am exiting the parking lot to hit the highway once again, my phone rings.. My Sister. I pick up and say "Hey, What sup?" she hesitantly responds, "Haley, are you safe? I am so sorry to call you and scare you but as I am at my desk working, I had this overwhelming thought that came over me, that something terribly bad was going to happen to you at the orientation this morning." She carried on, " I know you were in Karate growing up, and can handle your own, but the thought was so vivid, I had to pick up my phone and check to make sure you were safe." My chest caved in, and fingers were tingling hearing her murmur these words. I explained to my sister the terrifying thoughts I had one minute prior, and I pulled off again, into the next exit closest to me, and emailed the gentleman and cancelled this orientation, none the less, the job opportunity. The fact I had this thought, then my sister called outta left field, that was my confirmation.

I called my father who walked me through this situation, thoughts, feelings, and emotions, to make it all come together full circle, to be encouraged through the prompting scare rather than defeated.

Ya see, the Holy Spirit placed that prompt on my heart while I was driving, it was an alarm to say "Hey, somethings not right." Every part of me wanted to ignore it, and push that thought aside, it was suppose to be an exciting time, new opportunity, and better financial situation, but that would have been leaning on my own understanding, doing what I wanted, and having it play out what makes the most sense to me.

When my sister called me, that was my confirmation that something wasn't right. As the holy spirit was flooding over me, he also was speaking to her and prompting her to reach out. God's always working, he's always on the move and lining up the pieces. God is the ultimate prompter, always leading and guiding the way, but the question is, are we listening?

How many times do we take things into our own hands, silence the voice the speaks to us, and end up in messy situations... my answer is often, so you're not alone!

I am so grateful, I stopped, listened, prayed and than understood by my sister calling, understanding that was the confirmation that I needed to be protected. And even though that morning didn't continue as I envisioned it, it was exactly what God intended to take place, and I know his plans are for the ultimate best. 

Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. "

Let this be an empowering moment, an encouragement when you find your self thinking, 
"this doesn't seem right, or should I give this a shot" seek the Lords will in all you do, and listen for him to respond because he's speaking, leading and guiding our paths, but we are only able to follow his will if we are seeking, and just like this situation I was faced with Friday morning, his protection is around is, covering us, every moment, everyplace, and he is waiting for us to call out to him!

Be safe sweet friends, Stay Blessed, and remember, keep your eyes on the one who Loves you most, Jesus.

 

Until next time,

xox

 

Love: The Most Beautiful Drug

Relationships. The most intense thrill, the most challenging obstacle, most laughable adventure, yet most beautiful drug.

To give someone your time, energy, a listening ear, playfulness and words of wisdom, yet the scariest of all, your heart. Something so fragile that can break you, yet so strong because it gives you resilience.

Her past was difficult and chaotic but still held on to the rope of hope, yet it was to inconvenient for him to try harder. The past was one who loved themselves to much to see the big picture, and she lost herself trying to get you both to see the big picture. He turned her strong, willing personality into an issue, He couldn't handle being loved so much, and challenged often, so he hid the very traits that made her.. her.  And so she fell. and it wasn't a smooth glide,that chipped away at her bit by bit,  it was one where she came crashing down till she hit rock bottom. and who would of thought a rock bottom could be so beautiful. In fact, it was a perfect rock bottom, one where the only way she could go was up!

And years later, she lived differently, not because she had to, because she choose to. She looked at relationships through a different lens. The lens of Christ. The searching stopped when she had Jesus. She didn't need a man to complete her, Jesus already does. And that sweet friends is the best perspective. Knowing you don't need anyone to complete you or fulfill your life, you already have it. So if you do open up your heart, it's because it'll be a great addition, to what you already have, and want to build on. When two fulfilled people come together and run this race of life, together. 

So to the man who'll love her next, she's not looking for you, she's not liking your pictures on Facebook to seek your attention, she's not dressing provocatively to catch your eye, she's not making a scene so she get noticed. She's not sleeping with you to try to trick your emotions. She is fulfilled. She already has all she needs. So if you do build a friendship and see where it goes, it's because she didn't have to try so hard like her past. It's because her trust in the Lord drew you in, the way she lives fearlessly was intriguing, and the way she laughs at and with you keep you young. But be aware since she can be a little crazy, she has the ability to Love you like crazy. To the person who chooses to Love her, in advance, Thank You for loving her, She will never treat you less than you are. Every time she sees you, she'll treat it as the first. She will be grateful that you two started as friends, dove head over heels into each others lives, where no questions are out of range, no topic has a filter, being challenged will allow growth and only a Love for God can continue to guide the two of you down a beautiful adventure. 

A beautiful quote that inspired me once read " I've come to realize that relationships are the only thing we can take with us to heaven."

Relationships. The most intense thrill, the most challenging obstacle, most laughable adventure, yet most beautiful drug.

Until next time,

xox

Jesus Is Calling

Jesus Is Calling

I experienced something bold recently that lead me to open this blog and share my heart with all of you. 

As a single woman I have learned to embrace my singleness, which has taken years to get to that point, but my focus has shifted from seeking a relationship to embracing that time enthusiastically and putting it towards chasing after the Lord. Let me be real though, I still pray daily for what God has in store and to reveal it. One that'll lead two people on fire for Jesus closer together, closer to him and to reach others the way he intends. 

This past week the singleness crept in on me. So the battle with him and I began.Maybe its timing, maybe it's more preparing, maybe it's a slower process, my list went on.

So last week I sat at my work desk with the lights off for 15 minutes, and gave him all of me. The struggles, the unknowns, the whens and how comes. I gave him every detail of my hearts desires. When I was done I felt an overwhelming peace and began my day. Minutes later the first call that came through on my work phone said JESUS on the screen. Not a traditional last name, first name that always appears. There appeared 5 letters, JESUS. My eyeballs popped out and I said out loud "Jesus is calling." I actually stared at it and almost missed the call. Baffling enough the patients first nor last name was Jesus, although that was still the name that appeared. There I sat and just smiled.

I went outside to my car and cried. His name popped up and he spoke to me saying, "I'm here for you Haley, I hear your every prayer, I numbered your every tear, I'm with you Haley, I'm right here. "

So I say this to you: You may be upset, hurt or feeling un peaceful because something did not work out or isn't going as you planned. But you can trust God knowing that he sees the big picture, and is protecting you from something far greater than you see or know right NOW in this moment. Praise him right there. It may not even be for you, but for them, or others around you. Praise him right there.

The words that were placed on my heart tonight while reflecting on that moment was He's a lighthouse in a hurricane and he's leading you back home. Home is him. Keep your eyes and heart on him. Keep your thoughts and focus on him. He is the lighthouse in your hurricane and hes wanting to draw you back to him.

We only have a tiny perspective in what we see around us. He is the one who sees every moment. He knows what was and what is to come. You may be feeling some type of way, but hold true that daddy knows best. Thank hi for closing doors only he can close, and thank him for not answering prayers you begged him to answer. Keep praying, keep asking, and in due time his plan will unfold. It is in the hurricane where your faith is strengthened, where you see the lighthouse that'll guide you right back to him.

God will not withhold the best from you, so if something has been withheld, it's either not YOUR best, or it's not his timing at this moment and continue to trust what he can do. Even though this is a very personal moment I experienced, it's a bold and enthusiastic reminder to all that he's with you, he's listening, he's guiding and watching and he'll show up in the most mysterious ways... if you allow him.

Blessings to you in the days ahead, 

Until next time,

xox

The Prettiest Deceit

The devil doesn't show up with red horns, a brutal face, screaming out loud "I'm Satan" In fact he usually shows up looking like everything we ever wanted. 

The thing that makes us feel the most loved, most alive, gives us the most pleasure, and providing the next thrilling adventure. And so we cling to it. We chase it hard, pursue to no end, keep it at the forefront of our mind, and unfortunately blind our perception, so we don't have to face the reality of it. Even more so, we may not have to blind our perception rather we get so caught up, the thought righteous or not, tends to drift away. 

When a person, an item, or a thought crosses our path that grabs your attention, it's always good to ask God, " is this from you" and then have a conversation with yourself. Not a "convince yourself out of it conversation, rather a look in the mirror and be honest with yourself conversation."

Would it be pleasing to God? Is this leading me closer to Christ? If I act on this, will others see Christ in me? Those 3 simple questions will provide your answer immediately. 

Now lets be honest.. a lot of times many avoid those exact questions, because they don't want to face the raw truth. You wear a mask to hide your heart. If you enjoy it, you convince yourself it's from God, and if you don't enjoy it, you convince yourself " God has better plans in store for me."

You can't play God for a fool. Your life is already mapped out. The problem falls back on you and your relationship with God. Do you trust him? Do you trust that his ways are far greater than yours? Do you want to do what's momentarily satisfying, or live righteously before God even if it takes months or years to experience the ultimate journey of Joy he has for you.

Make sure you're not getting caught up in a life of deception, because the exact circumstance you're caught up in, is the thing that's most disappointing to God. He is there with open arms and won't let you fall, ears fully ready to listen, and a heart that's beaming to provide for you, if you seek him and his will for your life, rather than your own. 

I John 4:4  He who is in you, is greater than he who is in the world. 

The tough part for us all us usually God's plan doesn't look like ours. Our excitements are far different from what he envisions, our feelings that we get caught up in, are what we created, rather than what God provided, and the things that set our heart ablaze, if its not leading us closer to Christ  it will lack God's authentic blessings he's waiting to pour out.
So I challenge you and myself, are you living The Prettiest Deceit? Is your heart fully ready to Trust God and receive his ultimate pleasure and best? It can be tough, but when you're living in God's goodness, holiness, and pureness, there's a fulfillment and peace that takes over you, and a glorious life that awaits. 

Be Encouraged ya'll, and Be Blessed. 

Until next time, 

xoxo

 

Less of me

Let's start by saying, To God be all the Glory

If it wasn't for his compassion and grace, there'd be no hope in our story

We try to act really tough, but inside we're really broken

Big boulders that stand in the way, so our feelings become unspoken

We tend to look around, others seeming cheerful as can be

or could it be that they're struggling, on the inside like you and me

Better image, more money, perfect marriage, less fights, more trust, best job

we all have different wants, but did we ask Jesus what makes his heart throb?

Dear Lord please help me, through the pains that are so relenting

I don't want to live a life that's fake, in the unknowns always pretending

When I walk the narrow road, is my lifestyle pleasing to God

asking him to guide my path, or are my ways a glorious facade

attending church on a Sunday, but the rest of the week about me

my time, my choices, my actions, Dear Lord please set me free

Your strength, your truth, your direction, think it's Jesus, when it's Satan

Chasing the things I want so bad, yet always thinkin people are Hatin'

When I speak let it be your voice, when I act, be your hands and feet

when I pray let me seek your truth, when I encounter others may it be you they greet

Keep changing me Jesus from the inside out, let me hold your worth and plans to be true

cause how I handle this life in your hands, I want others to see YOU

Until next time,

xoxo

God Uses Broken Things (poem)

Some days we hold it all together, Other days we're a scattered mess

God uses broken things, Not a single day he loves us any less

His overflowing kingdom, Gives us grace through every test

God uses broken things, the way he sees fit, for the overall best

We often wonder, how can he forgive us, after all the mistakes that we made

God uses broken things, He declares a promise do not be afraid

I heard a whisper, and he calls us all by name

God uses broken things, to overcome guilt, overcome shame

Sinners like us can be forgiven, and the lost can always be found

God uses broken things, another person in heaven to receive a crown

Failed relationships, addictions, temptations, when it feels like you're a walking bruise, 

God uses broken things, it's the ones with the scars that he'll use

What you're experiencing now, and the circumstances you're yet to face

Remember God uses broken things, a child of God who endures, one that'll finish the race

He's the man who can heal, restore, defeat and open doors

God uses broken things, proclaim it out loud, God, I'M ALL YOURS!

 

Until next time, 

xoxo

Release and Receive

Release and Receive

Do you ever feel like your thoughts are playing a constant game of ping pong in your brain?  Maybe its something you've been praying for. Maybe its a hurt you cant just let go of that keeps circling, or maybe it's something you're trying to accomplish and you cant quite figure out how.  You have? Well you're not alone on this one.

I have those days too, and sometimes I wish I could end the game of ping pong and declutter all the thoughts and ideas that are at war with each other. A dear friend surprised me with a ticket to join them at the 2017 Light Festival in St. Croix Wisconsin last night. I appreciated the kind gesture and said thank you. My first thought was, "a fun night out with great people, and we get to write on lanterns and release them, should make for a good memory." It wasn't until that night, when I realized how much more it really was. 

We took the hour drive, and got shuttled to our destination. Food trucks, face painting for the kids, a few cows roaming around and were given our lanterns. The next few hours were filled with enlightening conversations, shoving our faces with ice cream sandwiches and writing on our lanterns. We each had our own space and took the market to paper. All those thoughts that fill our mind that we talked about earlier..those are the exact things we put on the lanterns. Our biggest dreams that we long for, our fears that we keep stumbling over, our prayers that he's heard many times, the love, the hurt, the roadblocks, the how to's, the whens.. we wrote them all, unfiltered, and no shame attached. We all stood, sang God Bless the USA, lit the lanterns and released them into the sky.

Now in this moment, there were hundreds, if not a few thousands, who stood side by side in strong emotion, wildest hope and anticipation feeling Free. It was as if we released everything to God in that moment knowing he'd grasp on, and continue to lead and guide those heartfelt words.

The gentleman that was with us, his lantern ended up ripping before we got started, we saw the big rip but didn't know if it would soar through the wind and take. However, we believed it would, we wanted so badly for his to catch fire and release. It was his turn to light his, and.... it caught fire, filled up and there it went!

And so here's my message to you. What ever you're holding onto, what ever is playing ping pong inside your brain, release it, and give it all over to God. He can jump right into your thoughts and give you peace and direction. He wants us to come to him with everything. The good, the bad, and the ugly. The things that may seem impossible or out of reach, the things we try to handle on our own, or the things that we cant let go of. Release and Receive what he will give back to you. And just like that lantern, even if you feel ripped up, broken, with no direction, let God define you. He will be right there, to ignite your fire, catch wind of you, and help you soar. 

 

Until next time,

xoxo

UNITE (poem)

I look at the world today, and it’s crumbling before our eyes

People are turning against each other, and the cities are filled with cries

Nation battling nation, Cities are being divided

Parents are in an uproar, and children are being misguided

I can’t go back and talk about, what got us to this point today

Instead of rehashing all the negative patterns, Let’s take action knowing there’s a better way

We could talk for hours about who’s in the wrong and who’s in the right

Passing blame onto others, thinking a fix is just to fight

That approach hasn’t worked, and I want to encourage you that’s not the way

Let’s do something difference for once, put it in Jesus hands, so he can have a say

Please don’t stop reading just because I said the word Jesus

He fills us with unconditional love and peace, it’s the devil who sneaks in and tried to tease us

Let’s stand for unity not division, support one another, not a head on collision

Show love to those we like, show love to those we don’t

If we choose not to take responsibility, change happening, wont

It starts within us, we can’t just wait and watch it unfold

We gotta be the peace makers in the community, it can’t be bought and it can’t be sold

Inner peace you can have it, it lives in you and me

You gotta reach in and find it, and I promise you’ll be set free

Showing respect and showing grace, to every person, every race

Not passing judgement, cause no ones the same, every individual has a story and each person has a name

Stereo types gotta go, the more you believe them, the less you truly know

Each person that you meet, I ask that you get to know their heart

Get rid of all the misconceptions, that’s being a leader and hey it’s a start

Stand up with positive action, stand up with a praising voice

Stand now and come together, let’s make division a past choice

You woke up today and took a breath, there are many cause of the chaos who don’t

If we all don’t personally make a stand to unite, just think, it could be you next who won’t

2000 yrs ago Jesus ended the debate on which lives matter, he died for us all, and paid a price

Black, white, Asian, Mexican we are all brothers and sisters in Christ.

We are a family, let’s join as a team

 To LOVE cause he first loved us, lets unite and respect one another, on the streets, on the trains, on the bus

Let’s let go of pride and not be consumed trying to prove a point

Are actions show character that’ll take a stand

Let’s stand now, come together, let’s start building one another up and grab one another by the hand

Let’s rid the path of destruction, and start a city of peace not war

Cause people who unite and stand together, will experience blessing behind every door

We all have a choice to continue this battle, and individually try to win

Or we can stand to Unite together and stop living this life of sin

Jesus died on the cross, to forgive you and me

Let’s change today for ourselves and one another, and live a positive impactful life of who were called to be

We all fall short from perfect, but we have to strive to at least get it right

With you make a stand with me now in this moment, and stand together and Unite

Until next time, 

xoxo

Beauty in the Broken

Statements that make your eyes pop out, a dig that hits your heart in a moments time, that's exactly what I experienced the other day.

The other day I ran into someone I haven't seen in a few years, and when they walked up to hug me they said, " Good to see you, but you're to skinny and need to eat." Those were the first words she rambled out of her mouth. The words don't affect me like they used to, however I was taken back. If anything, it made me more sad for her, that she was at a place where she thought making a dig on someone was helpful. 

 Ya see, growing up I was active in sports, active in the community and took care of my health. In my early 20's I experienced a few hardships that drained me mentally, physically and emotionally. I didn't try to lose weight, I didn't try to get excessively smaller, I wasn't out to impress anyone. The stress I was experiencing drained me and it took me physically first. 

 I have been on a 4 year battle to gain the weight back to where I once was, I tried many avenues to fix it, praying, shopping for baggy clothes, eating healthier, working out, eating junk food just trying to gain pounds. I. Tried. It. All. But within the last year, something changed in me, for the best. I recognized that I am the same person God created me to be, no matter my size. I feel good, I have energy, and I am content in my skin. I love who I am flaws and all. 

 Freckles, wrinkles, gray hairs, access weight, to skinny, external scars, internal scars, congenital abnormalities. Self love is so important. Embrace them. Embrace what God gave you. Embrace where you've been. Embrace where you are today.  

 We need more people to see each other's hearts, rather than outward appearance. Inner beauty lies within. We need to build each other up, empower one another to accept our differences, and what characteristics make us who we are and who we were created to be in Christ. 

 And maybe the next time we see someone who looks different, or is shaped differently, or has other beauty marks that we don't have, let your words compliment them first showing you see their inner beauty. Your statement can uplift, encourage and carry through a life time.

 Until next time, 

xoxo

Delayed But Not Denied

Sometimes do you find yourself praying and hoping that your breakthrough is moments away, only to receive a big fat NO!

That's been my reality throughout the past two months. Two months ago I stepped out in faith, and walked away from 10 years in the medical field to help expand the non profit myself and another founded years ago. Right when I walked away excited for what was in store, the non profit folded. Since then, no income in place, no job to wake up to. My dream quickly turned into living a tragic nightmare. 

I feel as if I'm getting so close to answers, a call I've been waiting for, a job opportunity, financial stability, a meeting to launch me into my career and there I wait, frozen in place, as if any moment could be the game changer. 

I pray daily for contentment, peace and the strength to find joy in the trials, but to be quite honest, my days have seemed more rough than smooth. I realize I have a choice to make. I can throw my self a pity party and get frustrated during this season of waiting, or I can sit back and try to understand what lessons there are to learn and grow from right where I'm at. I have to take this day by day. I am going to choose to wake up and be grateful for the things I do have, like family, friends, becoming an Author, and not focusing on the things I don't. I have to keep in perspective all the times I've cried out to God asking for help and answers, and he showed up and delivered me from those situations. I know all to well that Gods plan is the best plan, and even though I can't see the big picture right now, he  is working behind the scenes lining everything up, now I have to put the work in and Trust.

Maybe you find yourself in a similar situation, waiting to catch a break, hoping any moment your circumstances will change. Maybe in a relationship, a job choice, a diet plan, finances. Can I reassure you, you are not alone. I encourage you and myself daily to learn to trust Gods timing and his plans for our lives. It usually doesn't show up looking like we expect it to, however, his ways are far better than our ways and his timing is always perfect. During the waiting period, lets focus on being content, right here and now, lets find joy in the trials, peace in our circumstances, and faith that our breakthrough is right around the corner. Most importantly, lets not miss an opportunity to strengthen our relationship with God.

Until next time...

xox

He Defines

HE DEFINES who you are. HE DEFINES your worth, you are not your past. HE DEFINES your successes, you are not your failures. HE DEFINES your journey ahead, you are not your troubles. You are not how you feel on your worst day, HE DEFINES what is inside your heart. HE DEFINES and refines your heart.